Speak Your Mind!

For most people, the mere thought of speaking before an audience causes men's hands to go clammy and their hearts to pound like a kettledrum. Statistics show that people fear public speaking more than they do their own deaths. It shows that for the majority, people would rather die in silence than take a chance to speak their minds in society. Maybe it's conformity and a fear of saying something irrelevant.

The importance in public speaking lies in the fact that as social organisms, the ability to get your message across in the right way will do more good for you than the attempt to do a better job. Hunkering down faithfully to work is virtually useless if the boss does not even notice it.

The importance of public speaking is that it is inevitable. Sooner or later, you will be forced to enter the arena and speak to a sea of eyes and ears. Before that happens, it would always be better to meet that challenge on your terms.

Here are some points to ponder:

1. Career. People at work who can communicate better go up the ladder faster. Employers prefer hiring people with public speaking and communication skills. This is because speaking with your colleagues puts them at ease about you, helps you get your job done faster, and gets what you want done across much more easier.
2. Mental. You feel better about yourself. Successfully speaking before a live, listening audience improves your self-confidence, poise, character and sense of fun. You become less self-conscious, nervous, and can control higher levels of stress. This does not mean you won't make mistakes. Expect to make mistakes the first few times; learn from them, and keep on going. If you're consistent, that paralyzing fear of speaking to a large audience will be a thing of the past.

3. Opportunities. Public speaking positively impacts all aspects of your life. Being able to speak publicly opens up new opportunities unimagined in your former life. You will find yourself more eager to participate in causes you sincerely believe in, interact more with people of the opposite sex. You will find yourself assertively asking questions to clear up a problem, take the lead in a cause, or calmly explain a thorny situation without losing it. The effect of public speaking on your life is exponential.

Public speaking is an essential addition to the human repertoire. Technical knowledge is just as vital, but the ability to speak well takes your abilities and talents beyond the borders of your own skin and into the hearts and minds of others.

Seeds of Financial Success, Harnessing the Power of the Mind

What would you do with your life if you had 20 million dollars in the bank? Would you be as you are now, the same you, or would you be different? Certainly your life would change because you would be able to make new choices.

Did you know that you can use the power of your mind to achieve your desires and goals? To do so, you must change your mindset. As attributed to Lisa Diane, a well-know inspirational leader, to be wealthy, you must be wealthy (in you mind), think wealthy (your thoughts form your perceptions which form your reality), speak wealthy (speak only positive thoughts), and act wealthy.

Napoleon Hill spent 20 years interviewing 500 of the wealthiest people to find out what it takes to become wealthy. He interviewed notables including Andrew Carnegie, Henry Ford, John D. Rockefeller, Thomas Edison, Alexander Graham Bell and many others. In his book "Think and Grow Rich," Hill explained the common thread among the wealthy in being able to use the power of the mind to transfer thoughts into their physical reality.

You too, can use the power of your own mind to achieve your goals and desires. Apply the following rules to begin creating your own manifesting mindset:

1) Go, see, do. Be definitive in your desires. Know explicitly what you want. Manifest the desire clearly in your mind.

2) Be patient. Believe in your desires and expect them to happen. Trust that they will happen. But be patient.
3) Feel like you have your goals and desires now. Don't just visualize your desire, feel it.

4) Clear your mind. Get rid of junky and negative thoughts and focus in a positive way on your goals and desires.

5) Believe that you will get what you want. Beliefs create perceptions which create reality.

6) Use affirmations daily. An "affirmation" is "a solemn and formal declaration attesting to the truth of some matter."

7) Stay focuses on your desires. The more you visualize, feel, believe and affirm your desires (in a positive way), the more real they become.

8) Be aware of your dreams. They are reflective (although distorted) of your thoughts and emotions.

9) Don't doubt. Instead be sure that you will receive your desires. Don't try to control when or how; instead, just receive your desires when they come to you.

10) Clearly set your intentions. An "intention" is "an anticipated outcome that guides your planned actions." A realized goal or desire is the result of your intentions.

11) Be grateful for what you have, even before you have it. Expect and believe that you have your desire already, and be grateful for it.

12) Give to others, and in return you shall receive.

You produce your own reality.

Jim McCabe

 

Art of Flirting

Many people believe that the art of flirting is something that you either have or you don't. This isn't true at all. The art of flirting is something, which can be mastered by anyone with an interest in learning how to flirt. It's a practice-makes-perfect skill, which is learned from the inside out. Everyone masters the art of flirting differently, but there are some basics of the art of flirting which might help you to find the flirt within and bring her out to play.

The first thing to know about the art of flirting is that it's something, which can be done by anyone. You don't need to be the most attractive person in the room (and beauty is a subjective quality anyone) and you don't have to be the smartest, most athletic or most outgoing either. The art of flirting is designed to bring out the wonderful qualities that are unique about you and to let them shine so that others can be drawn to them. In this way, the art of flirting begins from the inside. Knowing the qualities you like about yourself and using them as a basis, the art of flirting is an art of quiet confidence.

But you want to know what to do to let others know that you're a terrific person right? The art of flirting is an art, which is primarily non-verbal. They say that the eyes are the keys to the soul and you should use yours as a starting point for the art of flirting. Have you ever been glancing around a room, bored and disinterested in what was going on around you when a stranger caught your gaze and held it for a few moments? For most people, this causes the heart to race and the mind to start whirring, wondering what it was about them that caught someone's attention. People are drawn to others who are attracted to them and you can convey your interest at many levels with the different types of looks you give to people. The art of flirting will incorporate many different types of gazes. If you are in a public setting and just want to catch the eye of a stranger, meeting their gaze and holding it for a few seconds then letting it go followed by meeting it again is the best method. This quickly conveys that you are interested in flirting with them and you will be able to tell from their reaction whether or not they share your interest. More aggressive flirting is done through giving the object of flirtation a look, which says, "I am thinking dirty things about you". Sometimes this is done with a lingering gaze, sometimes with an up-and-down-the-body glance and sometimes with a stare, which suggests that you are hungry and looking to devour them
n addition to eye contact, the art of flirting makes use of other types of body language. Positioning your body in such a manner that shows you are open to communication is crucial to the art of flirting. Touching the other person is also a big part of the art of flirting, but it should be done cautiously. You should read the other person's body language to determine whether they are welcoming the signals you are sending out. You'll be able to tell if it's appropriate to touch their arm or lean your leg against theirs while talking. The art of flirting consists of a combination of conveying your intentions while reading the signals of the other person. A successful combination of these two things which stems from a foundation of casual confidence in your own self worth makes the art of flirting enjoyable and fun.

Manifesting Success or Failure!

As we stand back an look at life, have you ever wonder why some do some don't? Why some people have things and others don't. Is it fate or is it action? The manifistation of success can't be fate. It has to be action or the lack of. If you sit back and do nothing, nothing is accomplished. Success is a state of mind that becomes a reality. Why? Because there was action. A thought, a dream, a desire was put into action in one way or another. A loser or failure usually comes from inaction or the lack of serious consideration of what one it doing.

Case in point. We all have our set backs. Things happen outside of our control. But how you handle it makes all the differince in the world. If you sit back and say I am doomed and do little to nothing you probaly will be. But if in your mindset you accept the worst thing that can come out of it, then you are free to solve the problem. What I'm saying is that if you don't clear the way for your mind by accepting the problem you will have a very hard time solve it, because your worrying about it.

It goes back to what the mind can concieve and believe the body can achieve. You have to think success to have success. You have to think winner to be a winner. No matter what you are doing in life, a runner, a business man, the common construction guy. If you don't believe you can do the job you won't.

Have you ever notice that the people that grow up with parents that say you will never be anything! Their friends tell them that you can't do that. You know what? These people grow up with everyone putting limitations on them and in their minds they are limited. Then you get the few who Refuse to believe. They will go on to do things far better than any of their family or friends.

Many many times we've heard about when the parents told their child that they can be and do anything they set their mind to. These children had no limitations sat on them and usually do very very well. In fact many of them become GREAT individuals. You have to believe in yourself. You need to grab life as it goes by not just let it float by.

The manifesting of positive actions and thoughts are the keystones of a successful life. 

How to Make Your Self-Help Really Help

Ray was on a tear.

"All that self-help stuff is okay, I guess, but it has never worked for me. Ever." He was starting to get excited, waving his arms and pacing around.

"In fact," he went on, "it usually makes things worse for me."

I asked Ray for examples.

"Well, like, I'm out of work -- you know that, right? -- and I've wasted the last two months trying to affirm myself a job." He sat down, dejected. "Heck, it would have worked better if I'd just gone and seen about all the jobs in the classified ads or visited the employment agencies."

"You didn't physically do anything to find a job?" I asked.

"Well no," he almost shouted. "I didn't want to drain my energy away from the affirmations. I mean, that'd show a lack of faith, right?"

Ray was running a pattern I'd seen him do before.

One time he had told me about the expensive new "good luck charm" he'd ordered. Paid a couple of hundred dollars for it, so it was sure to work. But it didn't -- at least not for Ray -- and the next time I saw him, he was complaining bitterly about how he'd been "taken."

Another time, he was attending a series of classes by a rising new teacher. This also bombed.

And now Ray was telling me that, other than doing his affirmations, he'd made no physical effort to receive the benefits he was programming for -- had avoided it, in fact.

Sooner or later, everything disappointed Ray. Nothing "worked" for him.

Ever had a little of that feeling?

Now, maybe most of us are not as extreme (nor as obvious) as Ray, but we've all had times when neither our best intentions nor our best efforts were rewarded. We got no results and we didn't know why.

Well, here's the short answer: for everything that happens (or doesn't happen) to us, all the causes are within ourselves.

That may sound a little too fuzzy-edged to grab hold of, or to do anything with, so let's break it down into smaller, simpler pieces.

PIECE ONE:
What you spend your time thinking about shows up in your life.

Buddha said it.

One way or another, all the religious teachers and philosophers have said it. And virtually every successful person who ever lived has told us this.

They all told us that the thoughts we think become real and happen to us.

PIECE TWO:
Positive thinking is not just repeating some phrases over and over.

Positive thinking -- ANY thinking -- is what you're expecting to happen to you this afternoon. It's how you feel about yourself, and about me, and about your neighbors and co-workers and family members.

Your thinking is more than just words. It's your feelings. It's your attitude toward yourself and others. It's what you expect to happen to you today and next week. And it's your determination never to give up when things get tough and don't go the way you had planned.

Your thinking is far, far more than just the words you repeat.

If you see somebody at your level or below and think they're not worthy of your notice, or if you see someone richer or more successful and you feel jealous of them, then that's not positive thinking. It's negative because it's expressing feelings of lack and limitation.

PIECE THREE:
If you don't know why events happen to you, then you don't know what you're thinking.

How can you control your life if you haven't yet learned to take control of what's going on in your own head? But the sad truth is, most of us are grossly unaware of what flits around in our skulls.

The enlightened being knows what's happening in their inner landscape, and can choose thoughts, select emotions and feelings, and direct their expectations with the same ease that you and I click buttons on the remote control. That's why they seem to have the events of their life under control.

And no matter how faraway that ideal may seem, you can learn to do some of that "enlightened" stuff too.

Here's a quick tip: Reverse engineer your life.

To find out exactly what thoughts, feelings and expectations are in your mind, look around at your physical life. Painful as it may be to admit, your life is solid evidence of what's emanating from your head.

Don't like what you see? That's good. In a moment we'll learn a way to use this to our advantage
PIECE FOUR:
Accept yourself, warts, hiccups and all.

Ray was always looking for something or somebody to "save" him. He had no belief in his own power, so he constantly sought out some outside power to lean on. Something to make up for his own powerlessness. He was seeking a guru or savior when it would have been more profitable to find a mentor that he could imitate.

Of course, he unknowingly felt he was incapable of being saved, so that outside guru or lucky charm or new technique always failed him. Naturally it failed -- all of his natural, inherent power (of which he was completely unaware) was being directed by his belief in his powerlessness.

Ask Ray if he was ready to recognize his limitations, and he would talk all around the subject, telling you why this book or that amulet didn't perform as promised. It was always "their" fault, not his.

We've all done this -- every one of us -- and it's a big stumbling block. We simply hate to see ourselves as we really are.

But if you want to get past this stumbling block, you'll have to give up the concept of "fault." Their fault AND yours.

In its place, you'll need to start using "responsibility."

What's the difference? Mainly resentment and guilt.

When anybody talks about fault, don't they usually go directly from that subject to WHOSE fault it was? And how badly it inconvenienced them? There's no power in fault.

On the other hand, if you take responsibility for an event, this implies that some kind of control is possible. It's a description of who has the power and how they CHOSE to use it.

PIECE FIVE
Everyone has power, even though they don't know it.

As we saw with Ray, he was using his natural power to form his world in a backwards way, keeping himself blinded to what he was doing.

And he was doing this by assuming that the power was "out there" somewhere. He was desperately seeking something or someone to lend him that power. But it always remained out there, out of reach, outside himself.

Okay, now let's talk about getting your self-help to really start helping.

STEP 1

List what's not working. What are the things in your life that are not the way you want them? Make a list, on paper.

This is a word-map showing exactly where you're unable to feel or accept your own power.

STEP 2

Take all those items on your list and spend 5 or 10 minutes fantasizing. Imagine what it would be like if you COULD control them. What if they were working perfectly for you? How would that look and feel?

Yes, I know that life never works out that way, and this excuse or that excuse is always in the way. Never mind any of that. Just sit yourself down and do it anyway. I mean, little else is working for you, right? So what's to lose?

STEP 3

Keep doing this regularly. Don't stop at one tepid toe-in-the-water trial. Do it often and get some enthusiasm into it.

STEP 4

When you get a hunch or idea or intuition, write it down before you forget it. Then go do it. Immediately.

Again, you should ignore any fears that "this won't work either" and just go ahead and give it an honest try.

Whether one particular effort brings smashing success or turns out to be a dud, keep on doing this. It makes just as much sense to do things this way as to continue on with your other method (that wasn't working).

STEP 5

Anytime you get results, whether good, bad or indifferent - anytime anything happens - deliberately repeat to yourself, "I caused everything about this situation. Nobody else stood in my way. It was ALL my doing, from start to finish, and I'm the power here."

WILL THIS REALLY WORK?

I guarantee this method will work at least as well as what you've been doing up till now, and you may be surprised to find it working far better. Why? because you're starting to fill your mind with things you want, emotions that support you, and expectations that these good things might actually be for you.

Furthermore, you're starting to practice control over what goes careening around in your head.

And that's the biggest key of all. 

Entrepreneurial Holiday Guilt for Creative Professionals

Guilt, guilt, guilt. Guilt is a terrible feeling and is often self-inflicted by creative entrepreneurs, especially during the holidays.

Most people who work for themselves say they chose to do so because they wanted to "control their time." People who value time over money, recognize that time is a precious commodity that cannot be created, bought, or borrowed. You have to use it wisely or else it is gone.

Having the luxury to control how, with whom, and where you spend your time is one of the bonuses of working for yourself. So, why is it that an overwhelming number of female entrepreneurs also say they feel guilty when they are not working on their businesses or with a client between the hours of 9 am to 5 pm?

To be truly happy and successful as an entrepreneur, you must break the corporate-created walls of time and learn how to set your day according to your needs and the needs of your clients. There is no law chaining you to your desk eight hours a day between 9 am and 5 pm.

Here's my advice: stop feeling guilty about when you are working and when you are not, and ditch the idea of playing by rules set up by other organizations. Make sure you benefit from the freedoms of entrepreneurship and maximize your time by performing regular activities such as food shopping at off times like 10 am on a Tuesday or having your teeth cleaned at 2pm on a Monday. You will spend less time waiting in line, you will be less stressed, and actually have more time to devote to your clients and other activities, then if you went on a weekend or during a busier time.

Of course, be sure to take a day or two off completely during the holidays to go gift shopping, ice-skating, or for decorating your home. Give yourself permission to enjoy your life and do something for yourself, even if it is on a week day between nine and five. You deserve it.

Happy holidays!

Career Move! From Shelf Filler to Manager

Are you in a dead end job? Are you fed up with low pay and long hours? Are you bored and want to do something more interesting? Do you want to be the person telling others what to do rather than being the one taking orders?

You can make it happen! if you are determined enough.

Consider the two alternatives, which one works for you?

Arrives late for work on a regular basis, usually chewing gum. Looks untidy, hair unkempt, nail varnish peeling and skirt very short. Only smiles and laughs loudly with her mates. Speaks to customers as little as possible. When asked if there is a top in another size. Answers "I don't know" or "if it isn't there we haven't got any"

Shows no interest on what needs to be done. Makes excuses to skive off when ever possible.

Does just enough to get by. Never takes the initiative. Walks past difficulties, doesn't see them or want to see them. A jar has broken leaving glass and jam all over the floor.

Is uncooperative or moody and sometimes both. Constantly complains that things aren't right, its not fair, out of order!

Boss sees no potential so takes little interest in her development. Job remains dead end, she gives little and gets no job satisfaction in return. Can't wait to leave.

What lies ahead…..another dead end job


Arrives on time, looking neat and tidy, ready for the days work. Knows the company policies about dress code and behaviour and follows them. Is always polite, friendly and professional.

Makes customers feel valued, is helpful and tries to sort out any problems. "I'll show you where they are" " They are out of stock but I can order one for you", I'll go and find out if we have any"

Is interested in how things operate. Asks relevant questions. Takes on her fair share of the work, offers to help others when it is appropriate. Takes a pride in doing things well.

Anticipates things, takes appropriate action. Thinks abut health and safety so blocks off the area and clears it up or reports it to the appropriate person.

Comes across as pleasant and professional even when having personal problems. If there is a problem, she goes to the right person, explains the difficulty and offers a suggestion about how the problem might be solved.

Goes to see the manager, expresses an interest in developing a career in the company. Asks for the opportunity for training. Takes each opportunity and makes the most of it.

Manager sees the potential invites her to join the trainee manager scheme.
Undertakes on the job training and rises through the ranks.

Manages her own store.


What do you want out of life?

Opportunities are what you make them. You have to take responsibility for your present and your future. Think about how you behave and how others see you.

If you don't like your present job think about what you really want out of life. The choice is yours!